A Series of Awkward Events
by xo Princess Lacey xo
Summary: A collection of juicy, awkward encounters between Katniss and Peeta.
1. An Icebreaker to Remember

**Hey everyone!**

**So, after I getting such a positive response for Always Lock the Door and The Artist (thank yous and shoutouts for everyone who read/reviewed/favourited/alerted! It really means the world to me!), I've decided to turn them into a series, A Series of Awkward Events!**

**Basically, I'll be writing a series of one-shots in the style of Always Lock the Door and The Artist (which will both be making a reappearance in this series – more on that later), plus I'll be exploring the progression of Katniss and Peeta's relationship. It's set in the HG world, but all the characters are alive :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games, A Series of Unfortunate Events or any other material or references that are under copyright that is not owned by me.**

**Also, a quick mention about the rating – the first few chapters aren't M, but they will be later, so I'm putting it on M in advance :)**

**Well, that's enough talking! Hope you enjoy :)**

It's a very pretty day in District 12 today. I've been hunting and made quite a bit of money selling off some game, so I'm in a good mood. I decide to take a trip to the bakery to buy some nice, fluffy bread rolls for dinner. I don't usually go there because it's a bit expensive, but boy, is the bread worth it.

I can already feel my taste buds salivating as I walk inside, smelling the delicious smell of processed wheat and baker's yeast. I approach the counter and see that Peeta Mellark, a boy from my class, is manning the till today. He's smiling – apparently he's having a good day, too.

"Afternoon, Katniss, what can I get you?" he asks.

"Some bread rolls, please," I say, a little distracted now.

Although I'd gone through most of my schooling with Peeta, I'd never really talked to him much. In fact, my memory of him hadn't seemed to have progressed much further than the 10-year-old boy who'd sat next to me in 5th-grade Math. He looked different now. Much different. He was taller and bulkier, and his face was quite hansom, really. I couldn't help but notice his arms and hands, thick and solid from all that dough-kneading and sac-throwing.

It takes me a few moments to realise that he's staring at me.

"What?" I ask, a little flustered.

"How many rolls would you like?" he asks.

"I'd like sex, please," I say.

Wait.

Did I just say what I think I said?

Oh no.

Oh _no_.

Peeta's looking at me with a funny expression, as are a few of the other customers in the shop. I notice with embarrassment that Oily Sae, the queen bee at District 12 High School, is holding onto every word.

"I'm sorry, what?" says Peeta, provoking even more feelings of mortification to rush through me.

"Six! Six rolls please," I reply, unable to think of anything else to say. I'm still in a daze as I walk out of the shop, clutching my bread rolls.

I manage to calm myself down a little as I walk home. Only a few people heard what happened. Peeta and I had never exactly been friends in the first place, so I wouldn't have to face him again if I planned my movements well enough. The only person who heard it who was our age was Oily Sae, and I tell myself she didn't care enough about the unpopular tomboy Katniss Everdeen to tell anyone about it.

As I arrive home, however, I realise that apparently I was wrong.

Madge and Prim are standing in the hallway, looking oddly sisterly with their matching blonde, ribboned ponytails, the same stern-yet-curious expression on their faces.

"Why did you ask Peeta to have sex with you?" asks Madge awkwardly, Prim nodding towards her in encouragement.

"Boy, does news travel fast around here or what?" I say. They're not going to be distracted that easily, though. They weren't going to let me go without an explanation.

"It was an accident," I say, cringing at how pathetic I sound.

"How do you accidently ask to have sex with someone?" asks Prim.

"I don't know!" I say. I was barely even able to process what had happened, let alone explain it to others.

"I don't quite know how it happened," I continue, "one minute, I'm ordering some bread rolls, then I'm noticing how he's grown since I last saw him, then he's asking me how many rolls I want and I'm saying sex instead of six!"

Madge and Prim are exchanging glances.

"Are you sure it wasn't your subconscious?" says Madge.

"What?"

"You know, maybe you've fallen in love with him and your subconscious couldn't resist the urge to fling yourself at him and make sweet, juicy love to him!"

I'm completely mortified, but apparently they're not done yet.

"Yes, that's a very viable notion," says Prim, "it's a hormonal thing, I think. Katniss, where are you in your menstrual cycle?"

"Oh my gosh, Prim! Seriously! Boundaries!" I cry.

"Calm down, Katniss," says Madge, who then proceeds to, in a vain attempt to conceal the action from me, whisper "PMS" to Prim, who quickly runs over to the calendar and puts a big red cross on today's date.

"You should ask him out," says Prim, giggling, but before I have the chance to whack her on the head with a pillow, I hear the front door closing, and Gale walks in.

Oh no. Please, please, please let him have not heard what Prim just said!

"Ask who out?" he says. Madge and Prim burst into endless giggles.

"Nothing," I say, trying desperately to change the subject, "What brings you here?"

"Well, word on the street is you offered your services as a prostitute to the baker's son," he says, an odd expression on his face.

"I course I didn't!" I say.

"I'm not judging, Katniss, you're free to do whatever you want. I just came here to let you know that if you're really that hard up for cash, I can lend you some if you need."

"Gale, I'm not a hooker!"

"It's true," says Madge.

"Thank you, Madge. There, do you believe me?" I say to Gale.

"She offered it for free," she continues, and she and Prim burst into another round of giggles.

"Really, Katniss? I didn't know you had the hots for Mellark," says Gale, that funny expression back on his face, this time magnified.

"I don't have the hots for him!" I shout.

"Oh, so you were wanting a bit of stress release? Ok, ok, this is making a bit more sense now. You know, Katniss, I'm sure I'd've been willing, if only you'd asked," he says. I'm unsure whether he's joking or not, but I'm beyond caring.

"Seriously, Gale, it was an accident!"

I run out onto the street, and shout it out for the whole world to hear.

"IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!"

Everyone on the street turns to look at me, and start chattering amongst themselves, no doubt about how the local hooker has now gone loopy.

Hmm, maybe not the most well-thought-out plan I could have made, but hopefully people might start seeing sense.

Out of the corner of my eye, I think I notice Peeta Mellark. But I blink, and he's gone.

It takes a good few weeks for the rumours to disappear, but things haven't been quite the same between me and Peeta. Despite my attempts at avoiding him, I'm noticing him near me more and more. One day, he even says hi.

Well, I certainly did have an icebreaker to remember.

I think next time I'll just stick to hello.

**Please review! :)**


	2. The Pen Pal Part 1

**Hey everyone! Thank you so much for all the reviews/favourites/alerts, it means so much to me!**

**This one-shot is actually a two-parter. This one gets a bit tender in parts (I wanted to explore K and P's relationship a bit further), but for those of you who don't like that sore of stuff, don't worry, the next chapter will be pure, unadulterated awkwardness!**

**Also, just a quick note about how often I'll be updating – I'm crazily busy at the moment so I won't be updating every day – I will try my hardest though to update at least once a week :)**

**Enjoy! :)**

_My life just seems to be completely perfect! Katniss, you have no idea! I passed 12__th__ Grade with a perfect score and I got into a college in the Capitol. Plus Marvel, you know, my amazing boyfriend who I was telling you about, just bought me a fancy car from the Capitol! I love him to bits, Katniss. Really, K, you need to find yourself a boyfriend. It's getting kinda sad actually, you not being able to snag anyone. Maybe I could give you some pointers?_

Ugh. I always hate reading letters from my cousin Glimmer. Her life is so sickeningly perfect, it makes me want to hurl a brick in her face, just so one thing on her perfect body wouldn't be so perfect any more.

I'm beginning to write the usual replies of _Wow, that's amazing, you parents must be so proud! _and _It's ok, G, I just haven't found the right guy yet_, when I look out the window. Peeta Mellark is walking past, a sack of flour slung over his shoulder, whistling in the breeze.

Hmm. Peeta was a boy, who was kind of a friend. What would the harm be if I omitted the space between the words _boy_ and _friend_? Glimmer would never know the truth, and then she'd stop pestering me and sending me depression-inducing letters bragging about her perfect boyfriend.

_Hey, G, guess what, I do have a boyfriend!_ I write. _His name is Peeta, he's the local baker's son. He's so strong, you should see him heaving a sac of flour! God, he's so sexy, all the girls want him, but he picked me, of course!_

Well, it wasn't exactly a lie. I was just stretching the truth. A lot. Besides, a lot of the girls did want him, that was definitely true. I'm sure the choosing me part would be real if I tousled my hair a bit and undid a few buttons of my blouse.

Maybe.

I'm feeling a mixture of guilt and satisfaction as I drop the letter into the postbox. Finally, a letter that didn't make me look like the unlovable loser that Glimmer was, by now, convinced I was.

I decided to take a nice, long walk, before returning home. Mom, Dad and Prim were in the kitchen, fussing over a batch of stew.

"Hey, Katniss!" Prim greets me, "Guess what! We've got some exciting news!"

"Well, what is it?"

"Cousin Glimmer, Cashmere and Gloss are coming to stay! I think Glimmer's taking her boyfriend, too!"

Oh no. Oh no. OH NO!

I realise Prim, Mom and Dad are looking at me funny, and I quickly plaster a veneer of excitement onto my face. I tell myself to keep calm – I'm sure there's some way to get through this.

During dinner, the solution hits me. Of course! I'll ask Peeta if he can pretend to be my boyfriend. I know it will be a bit weird asking him, but he's been pretty friendly to me lately, and it wasn't like I had another option.

I approach him the next day during music class.

"Hey, Peeta," I start out. He looks up with a happy but curious expression on his face. This was the first time I'd made the first move when talking to him.

"Hey, Katniss, what's up?" he replies.

I'm very tempted just to make a bit of small talk and walk off, but I force myself to get the words out.

"Um, well, what would you say if I somehow left a cousin of mine with the impression that you were my boyfriend and that she's coming to stay tomorrow, and I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend?"

"I'd say you're insane," he says, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Seriously, Peeta! My life will be over if you don't do this!"

"Oh, ok, fine. But you'd better be a good pretend girlfriend!"

The next day, Peeta comes over, and we announce to the family that we are 'in a relationship'.

"Really, Katniss, are you sure you want this boy? Gale's much more sexually attractive, and he can hunt better," says Dad.

"Dad!" I shout, but he hasn't finished yet.

"Peeta, I want to know your motives," he says.

"Well, Mr Everdeen, I want to make Katniss a happy, secure woman," he says.

"There, are you happy Dad?" I say.

"No, I most certainly am not. How does one make a woman? Are you two thinking about having a child already? Katniss, is that what this is about? Are you pregnant?"

"No Dad, I'm not!"

"Are you sure, Katniss? You're looking a bit bloated," says Mom, a concerned expression on her face.

"I think the bloating's from the sex," says Prim, "I heard that some girls go a bit bloated if their amorous activities are a bit too fast for them to handle."

Mom nods in agreement, and I know I have to jump in before they start some academic discussion about my hypothetical sex-life

"I am not pregnant, nor am I having sex with Peeta!" I shout, but my family don't seem convinced. Luckily, I'm saved by the doorbell, and I shoot out to answer it.

"Katniss!" squeals Glimmer, looking as infallibly beautiful as ever. My cousins Cashmere and Gloss are standing behind her, as well as a brutish-looking man I can only conclude is Marvel.

"Glimmer!" I reply, welcoming my cousins inside.

"Glimmer, this is Peeta," I say, as soon as they are inside. I have the satisfaction of her smug grin faltering a little at the sight of him – I made him wear a singlet that would show off as much of his arms as possible.

"Katniss, Peeta, this is Marvel," she says, gesturing to the brutish man.

"Well, it's lovely to see you all, but we really must be going!" says Mom, who ushers Dad out the front door. She's going through a bit of a 'laid-back' parenting phase at the moment, and thinks the 'young things' should be left alone as much as possible.

We decide to flick on a movie, and we're utterly engrossed in _Pretty Woman_ when I notice Glimmer and Marvel have their tongues down each other's throats. Glimmer catches me watching her, and gives me a smug wink before proceeding to unbutton Marvel's shirt.

I'll show her. Peeta's sitting next to me, blissfully unaware of what's coming. In a few short seconds, I've plonked myself on top of him, my lips barely an inch away from his.

He gets the message pretty quickly. He pushes his lips on to mine, and I feel a jolt of electricity rush through me.

_It's just acting_, I tell myself, but I can't seem to control myself. I'm kissing him back, hard, and my hands tangle into his hair. He's not holding back, either, kissing me deeper and faster, and before I know it, I'm struggling for breath.

Only a very small part of me registers the opening and shutting of the front door.

"Katniss? Peeta?"

I reluctantly break apart from Peeta and look up to see Gale standing by the living room door, staring at us. As soon as I see him, I jump up from the sofa, self-consciously straightening my shirt.

"Since when were you guys make-out buddies?" says Gale, that funny expression on his face.

"She's my girlfriend, actually," says Peeta, coming up to stand beside me.

"Oh yeah? Since when?" asks Gale, anger creeping into his face.

"Since ages ago," I say, worried that Peeta would reveal something he shouldn't.

"Well, nice of you to tell me," says Gale, storming out.

I'm in a bit of shock as I sit down again. Glimmer is staring at me, jealously plastered over her face.

"What was that all about, then?" she asks.

"Oh, it's nothing," says Peeta, before I get the chance to speak, "I have to deal with guys like that all the time. It's something you get used to after a while. Everyone wants Katniss, I'm the luckiest guy in the world to have her."

I'm completely touched by Peeta's words. Sure, he was acting, but I still feel so grateful for what he's said. I watch with glee as Glimmer storms off, unable for once to one-up me.

"Thanks, Peeta," I whisper.

"No problem," he whispers back.

I'm feeling confused. Some weird feelings are spreading through me, and I'm not sure what to make of them. But I don't have enough time to dwell on them – Glimmer's still here, and we've still got a lot of acting to do.

_To be continued_

**Please review! :)**


	3. The Pen Pal Part 2

**Hi everyone!**

**I just want to thank you all for reading/reviewing/alerting/favouriting, I love you guys so much!**

**Sorry, this update took a bit longer than I was hoping. Life is pretty hectic at the moment, but I will try and update more often!**

**Here's part 2 of Pen Pal, and, as promised, things will be heating up a little!**

**Hope you enjoy :)**

"So, K, how intimate are you and Peeta?"

I don't know quite how I managed it, but despite my attempts at preventing myself from being left alone with Glimmer, she's sidelined me and decided we need to have some 'girl talk' about our respective boyfriends.

"Um, well, pretty intimate, I guess," I say cautiously.

"Like, how intimate though? Are you sleeping together yet?"

Sleeping? What was the big deal about sleeping? I guess it did take some courage to fall asleep in another person's presence, but I always thought the most intimate thing a couple could do was have sex. Huh, things must be different in District 1.

"Um, yeah, all the time!" I say enthusiastically.

"Well, us too!" says Glimmer defensively, "As a matter of fact, we'll be going it tonight. Things might get a bit loud, I hope you guys won't be disturbed."

Loud? I guess they must be snorers. Must be something sexy in 1, although it certainly isn't here. But, it'll be easy to beat them out on that one.

"Us too. We're so loud we get complaints sometimes. One time, the neighbours actually recorded us and sent it to one of the local radio stations and it was played in front of the entire district. It was all anyone could talk about for weeks."

Glimmer is looking shocked, and informs me that our girl talk has now come to an end, and that she has to get upstairs and go and sleep with Marvel.

Good, a job well done.

I go to find Peeta to tell him the good news. He's been getting quite into it all, and always wants to hear the latest in the battle between Glimmer and I.

Unfortunately, rather than the laughter or radiant smile I'd expected, his face is filled with the same kind of shock that Glimmer's was a few minutes earlier.

"What do you mean you told her us having sex was played across the entire district!" he shouts.

What an odd misinterpretation.

"What? No! They played our snoring!"

"What?"

"Our snoring! Glimmer says they got loud when they're sleeping, I thought she meant snoring!"

"Oh my gosh, Katniss! Are you really telling me you don't know what she meant?"

"Huh?"

"Sleeping means sex, Katniss! They use that word in the Capitol sometimes."

Oh.

My.

GOSH.

How could I have been so naïve? To be fair, I'd only ever heard sleeping used that way a couple of times, but really! Stupid Katniss, stupid, stupid!

I flush all over in embarrassment as I realise the implications of what I said. No wonder Glimmer was so shocked!

"I have to tell her," I say. Sure, I wanted to beat her, but was it really worth sacrificing that much of my dignity?

"Oh no you don't," says Peeta.

"What? Why the Hell not?"

"I'm not letting you lose now, not when we can turn this around. Come with me," he says.

He takes my hand and pulls me upstairs. I'm unsure what exactly he's going to do, but I decide to go with it.

We walk past Glimmer and Marvels' door, which is slightly ajar. I look in and see Glimmer's eyes shimmering in the darkness. From what I can tell, she and Marvel have wasted no time in getting the 'sleeping' started.

Whack!

It all happens in a second, and I'm dizzy and disoriented. It takes me a few moments to realise what has happened, but when I do, I feel like my body is on fire.

Peeta has pinned me to the wall, in a very erotic manner, and is waiting for me to kiss him. All too willingly, I oblige, and I feel myself beginning to lose control.

Within a few moments, though, Peeta's mouth is gone, and I feel his lips at my ear.

"Do exactly as I say," he whispers.

He disentangles himself from me, takes my hand, and pulls me to my bedroom. He slams the door shut.

"Take your clothes off," he says.

"Excuse me?" I say. I'm all for kissing Peeta for the sake of competition, but sex? I have at least some dignity, and this was way past the line.

"Not so we can have sex, but so Glimmer thinks we are," he whispers.

Oh, right. Fair enough, I think. I give Peeta a nod of assent.

"I'll turn around and give you my shirt. Wear it on top of your underwear."

I'd seen enough sex scenes in movies to know that this was a valid wardrobe choice, so I do as he says, but I leave my underwear on, at least. I turn around and see Peeta only in his boxers, and I ignore the resulting spark of excitement that rushes through me.

"Oh, Katniss!" says Peeta, in a soft kind of moaning sound. He gets up onto the bed and starts jumping up and down, making it squeak very audibly. He gestures at me to do the same.

"Oh, Peeta!" I say in the same kind of moaning voice Peeta used.

We continue this, getting louder each time, until Peeta screams "KATNISS" as loud as he can possibly muster.

I'm about to scream "PEETA" when I hear the click of the door.

"Katniss, dear, are you alright?" says Mom, who's standing at the doorframe, an odd expression on her face.

I immediately jump off the bed, blushing all over with embarrassment. It was all very well having Glimmer think Peeta and I were having sex, but Mom? I shudder at the thought.

"It's not what it looks like!" I say, knowing that this is a terrible defense, but I'm unsure what else to say.

"It's ok, Katniss, I understand that you young people have urges, and there's nothing wrong with exploring them as long as you do it safely. Do you want a condom?"

She's holding a box of them out to Peeta, and I'm beyond mortified.

"Thanks, Mrs Everdeen," says Peeta, all charm.

"You are very welcome, Peeta," she replies, and she is just about to leave the room when Prim comes in.

"Katniss! I heard sounds of ecstasy emanating from your room and I just came to congratulate you on losing your Precious Gift!"

"Prim, nothing happened!"

"Oh, don't give me that. Look at you, your whole body is flushed red with pleasure."

I want to tell her I'm flushed red with embarrassment, but I can't find the words. I'm about to usher her and Mom out of the room and lock the door before anything else can happen, but the very last person I want to see has turned up.

"Glimmer!" I say to her. She too is wearing only a shirt, her hair and makeup artfully tousled.

"Katniss," she says, "I just came to say you win. I don't know how I can beat having sex on District radio, and in front of your mom and sister as well!"

Prim and Mom are looking on with confusion, and I know they are beginning to suspect the truth about me and Peeta.

It's too late. I feel the guilt, the lies, the truth all threatening to escape.

"I'm sorry, Glimmer, but there's something I have to say. Peeta isn't my boyfriend. He's just an amazing friend. I got jealous of your letters and your perfect everything. I guess I wanted some of it for myself."

Glimmer's face is initially full of shock, and then changes slowly to one of victory. But before she can say anything, Marvel comes to join us.

"Glim, are you coming back to bed, or what? You do know this is a pay-for-hour thing, right? I'm charging you even when we're not having sex."

Oh my gosh. Glimmer was making it up all along! I'm filled with satisfaction that her perfect life wasn't actually so perfect after all, then guilt that I wasn't any better than her.

I then feel a hint of pity.

Because Glimmer had to pay for her fake boyfriend. Mine did it for free. As I look up at Peeta, I see him smiling, but there's no disguising the twinges of sadness that are there, too. I make a vow from now to be nicer to Peeta. Maybe we could even be friends.

I'm relieved when we wave goodbye to the extended family, but I feel a little sad waving goodbye to Peeta. Even though he only lives a few streets away, I definitely notice the distance.

It could be the post-not-quite-coital hormones talking, but I think I actually miss him.

**Please review :)**


	4. Just Say No

**Hi everyone!**

**Oh my gosh, 50 reviews! Thank so much everyone! Thanks also to everyone who reads/favourites/alerts :)**

**As a thank you for the 50 reviews, I squeezed in some extra writing time and got this next chapter done as quickly as I could!**

**Here's Just Say No. Hope you enjoy it!**

I'm sitting in the woods with Gale. We've just been hunting, and we're sitting down at our favourite spot, watching as the sun sets over the beautiful horizon.

I have to hand it to Gale. Most best guy friends wouldn't take their best girl friend's fake dating and allegedly-nationally-broad-cast sex with Peeta Mellark very well, but Gale has risen up and proved himself a fantastic best friend. He told me he's totally fine with me and Peeta, and that there is no jealousy or strings attached to our friendship, and that he was sorry if it ever came across that there was. He then asked me if I wanted to go hunting with him today, so I thought why not.

Gale hands me a flask of tea, and I gratefully sip it. It's getting a bit cold now, actually, so I enjoy the sensation of the hot liquid flowing into my mouth. It tastes a bit odd actually, but I assume it's some sort of funny new concoction of Greasy Sae's creation.

I finish the contents of the flask, set it down, and I notice I feel a bit strange. My body is tingling a bit.

"Are you ok Katniss? You look a bit cold," Gale says, concernedly. He wraps his arm around me and leans his head on top of mine and sighs.

I sigh too, because rather than settling down and sighing at the sunset, all I want to do is jump up and try and alleviate the tingling in my body. Out of nowhere, my mind flicks to Peeta, and the tingling gets stronger as I remember the kisses we shared just a few weeks ago.

I can't take it any more. I stand up, stretch out my arms and legs, and am poised to start running back to District 12, when Gale interrupts my train of thought.

"What are you doing, Katniss?" he asks, frowning.

"I'm going off to find Peeta!" I say, giggling.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay here and snuggle up with me? It's getting kinda cold," he says, frowning even harder.

"Nope! I have to find Peeta and merge our bodies into one in a sweet, juicy orgy of the flesh! Sorry Gale, we'll finish this evening off some other time!"

And without a backward glance, I start running toward the outskirts of District 12.

I'm practically feverish when I bang on the Mellarks' door. I hear a rustling inside and footsteps approaching the door.

I shut my eyes, unsure whether I'd be able to get the words out I need to say while I'm actually looking into Peeta's intense blue eyes.

"I love you, I always have and I always will, and all I want to do is rip your clothes off and ravish you right here, right now!"

I open my eyes, pleased that I'd managed to say the words, when I'm gripped immediately with mortification.

Peeta's father is standing there, looking bombshelled.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry, Mr Mellark! I thought you were Peeta!"

He manages only a brief nod.

"Um, can I see him?" I ask tentatively, worried that I might never set eyes on Peeta again.

He merely nods and saunters back down the corridor.

Peeta walks up to the front door, a confused expression on his face.

"Hey Katniss. Listen, you haven't said anything weird to Dad, have you? He looks like he's been shot or something."

"No, no, nothing you need to worry about," I say, blushing, extremely keen to change the subject.

"Alright," he says, unconvinced, but thankfully he doesn't press the subject. "So, what brings you here?"

At that moment, my mind switches back to its original objective, and the tingling comes all over my body again, and as I look into Peeta's beautiful eyes, at his strong, muscly arms, his sexy, golden hair, the tingling grows so strong I can't contain myself.

I fling myself onto his body, and his arms wrap around me to catch me. His eyes are filled with confusion, but he doesn't stop me as I press my lips onto his, and kiss him with such urgency this might as well have been our last minute alive.

I'm losing control, the tingling is taking over my entire body. I'm itching to go further, to rip off the clothes that are keeping us apart, when Peeta takes his lips away from mine and sets me gently on the ground.

"Katniss, what are you doing?" he asks, gently.

"Making sweet, juicy love to you, of course!"

Peeta is looking confused again, and, even in my tingle-ridden state, I can tell he's finding it hard to express his thoughts, a very rare occurrence for him.

"Why do you want to have sex with me Katniss?" he asks.

"Because you're sexy and you're handsome and I'm completely in love with you!"

Peeta's eyes light up, but I can see the internal struggle he's facing.

"Katniss, you haven't been drinking, have you?" he asks.

I'm getting annoyed now. The tingling is getting so intense I can barely stand up. So I decide to take action. I run up to him, take hold of his shirt, pull it over his head and fling it into the bushes, and do the same with my own. I want to take more clothes off, but I don't think he'd let me, so instead I fling my body at him and kiss him once more.

The tingling is getting even stronger and I feel like I'm on fire. Peeta, although somewhat hesitant, isn't stopping me this time, and I feel the thrill of defeat. His hands fondle with the clasp of my bra, and tingles run up my spine.

"Oh my gosh Katniss, what are you doing?"

At first I thought it was Peeta, and I immediately stiffen. But the tone of the voice registers in my sluggish, tingle-ridden brain and I recognize it as Gale.

I turn around angrily to face him, immediately redoing my bra.

"What the Hell are _you_ doing, Gale? Friends do not interrupt friends having sex. That is majorly uncool."

I scowl at him with as much ferocity as I can muster.

"Katniss, were you really going to have sex on a doorstep. With _Mellark_?" says Gale, adding a quick "No offense, dude," at the end.

Peeta wraps his arm around me, and I feel incredibly safe in his iron grip.

"Whatever Katniss choses to do and with whom is entirely her business," says Peeta coolly.

Gale's looking angry, and I glare at him with a silent "Don't you dare start an argument."

The tension in the air is unbearable, and I'm relieved when I see my slutty cousin Clove, who's visiting from District 2, walking past.

"Oh, hey guys! What's up?" she asks, wandering up to the doorstep to join us.

"Katniss and Peeta were just about to have sex," says Gale, his voice hard.

"Oh, great! An orgy! I'll join you!" says Clove. We watch on in amazement as she proceeds to strip down to absolutely nothing. Peeta and I avert our gazes when she removes her underwear, but Gale doesn't seem too keen to look away.

"Now, how are we doing this? Is it like a whole group thing or are we just gonna pair off?" asks Clove.

I hoped Peeta or Gale knew what to say, because I was dumbstruck.

Luckily, we were saved the necessity, as Peeta's mother chose that specific moment to mosey up the hallway to have a gawp.

Unfortunately for her, she wasn't quite prepared for the scene in front of her, and I watch in helpless silence as her face slowly turns purple.

"Peeta Mellark, would you care to explain what is happening!" she says, forcing the words out through gritted teeth.

"It's not what it looks like," he says, unable, as was I, to formulate some form of reasonable explanation.

Unfortunately, whatever plan Peeta had for solving the situation was immediately ripped to shreds as Clove decides to weigh in on the discussion.

"We're having an orgy, Mrs Mellark!" she says brightly, "Would you care to join us?"

I really do have to hand it to Clove. Not many people could make me laugh in a situation like the one I was in now, but I had to stifle an eruption of giggles when she said that.

"I most certainly would not! Would all of you please leave right now!" replies Mrs Mellark. Gale and Clove walk off together, and although Clove is looking a bit disappointed, I can tell from Gale's lustful expression that they may have plans to salvage the evening.

I wave goodbye to Peeta, not even bothering to fish my top out from the bushes. I walk home, the picture of demure elegance in my bra and jeans, feeling the tingling slowly dissipate and the fogginess in my mind disappear.

I realise Gale must have drugged me, and I make a mental note to kill him in a slow, painful manner. I then flush with embarrassment as I remember my actions earlier in the evening, but somehow I cannot bring myself to regret them.

I make another mental note to visit Peeta again sometime soon. Purely as a gesture of friendship, a platonic visit between two friends. It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he is extremely attractive and an amazingly good kisser.

No, nothing at all.

;)

**Please review! :)**


	5. Naked

**Hi everyone!**

**As always, a huge thank you to everyone for reading/alerting/favouriting/reviewing :)**

**Now, for the serious stuff. I need your help. I came into this fanfiction with all of my chapters outlined, and a plan of how the story will progress. The problem is, Katniss and Peetas' relationship has moved faster than I was planning, and now a lot of you are wanting them to get more serious. Unfortunately, quite a few of the chapters I was planning are based on the sexual tension K and P have before they get together. I've been looking it over, and have come up with two options:**

**1. Stick to my original plan. This means around five more chapters before Katniss and Peeta get together, and then some more after they get together.**

**Or**

**2. Change it so that Katniss and Peeta get together in the next chapter or two. This means some chapters will be cut, while others I can adapt to Katniss and Peeta's relationship, but they might not be as funny or awkward. It also means that the story will probably finish a couple of chapters shorter than planned.**

**If you could let me know which option you prefer, I'd be very grateful! I want you guys to enjoy this story, so I need to know what you want :) Just let me know in a review, or PM me if you prefer :)**

**Thanks guys! Sorry for such a long AN!**

**I hope you enjoy Naked :)**

I love Saturday mornings. Mom and Dad are always out at the market, and Prim is usually off with her friends, leaving the house to myself.

I take a quick shower in the bathroom Prim and I share. I realise when I get out that I left my towel in my room. Damn. I look at my pyjamas crumpled up on the bathroom floor, and decide just to make a run for it.

It feels kind of exciting, running through the corridor, wearing nothing but my Birthday Suit. I'm sure it would be more exhilarating if there were other people here, but hey, I was still completely naked!

"Katniss!" says a voice, and I stop dead in my tracks. What? I thought I was alone!

"Prim, what are you doing here?" I ask her. She's standing there, staring at me, trying to fight an eruption of giggles.

"We were all just about to leave, but we had a surprise visitor," she says.

"Well, that's nice for you, isn't it," I say angrily, and turn to run off to my room.

"Yes, yes it is. Now, Katniss, I think we need to have a bit of girl talk. You didn't tell me you were up to Stage 5 of your breast development!"

"Excuse me?" I ask her with the most menacing voice I could manage. Prim really did take the nerdy sister thing to a whole new level.

"Oh, Katniss, don't go looking so discombobulated! I'm doing a paper on reproduction in Biology at the moment, and I need to record some data," she says, pulling a tape measure out of her pocket.

"Oh my gosh, Prim! Seriously, can you please pick something else to study!" I say.

Prim looks ready for a full-on argument, but Mom arrives before she can say anything.

"Prim! I told you to get Katniss ten minutes ago! Our guest is waiting!" she says.

"I'm sorry, Mom, but Katniss was being uncooperative with my Biology assignment, and I was trying to talk some sense into her!" she says.

"Katniss! That's not like you!" says Mom, and turns to look at me for the first time this morning, "What an interesting outfit you chose," she adds.

"I didn't think anyone was home!" I shriek.

"Well, I think it may actually be a very good outfit choice for the occasion today, nonetheless. I think it might be a bit heavy-going initially, but I think it'll make a good, lasting impression."

"Oh, I agree!" chimes in Prim, "Clothes merely mask Katniss' pheromones. Plus, the sight of her newly-developed Stage 5 bosom may just have the effect we're looking for!"

"Oh, I hadn't noticed those! Mazel tov, Katniss!" says Mom.

"Seriously guys, can we focus here! What are you talking about, why do you want me to meet this visitor _naked_?"

"Goodness me, Katniss! Aren't you cantankerous this morning! Don't you go worrying your pretty little head about it, and just follow me."

Mom walks towards the living room, and Prim beckons me to follow, but I stand glued to the spot.

"No way am I going out there with no clothes on!" I whisper angrily to her. But apparently I have no choice in the matter, because before I know it, she and Mom have forcibly dragged me into the living room, and there I am, standing in the middle of the living room, my eyes squeezed shut with embarrassment.

"Good morning, Katniss," says an all-too-familiar voice.

I slowly open my eyes, and my fears are confirmed.

Peeta Mellark is standing right in front of me, trying very hard to keep his eyes on my face.

"Morning, Peeta," I say, blushing furiously.

"So, Peeta, what do you think of Katniss' breasts?" says Prim, holding a pen and clipboard, poised to write.

"PRIM!" I shriek, completely mortified.

"Oh, shut up Katniss," she says, and looks at Peeta expectantly.

"I, um, well, um,…" he stutters, "They're, um, very nice."

I blush even harder when he says that. I risk a glance into his eyes, and he looks right back. Time passes immeasurably, and I feel like I'm locked there, some inescapable power keeping me from looking away.

"So, Peeta, how's school?" asks Mom, jolting me back into the real world.

"It's going very well, thank you," says Peeta.

Peeta smiles tentatively at me. I blush more, and I remember I'm naked. Ugh. I decide I've fulfilled my social obligations and decide to take action.

"Well, it's been nice talking to you, but I have to go do some homework," I say, turning towards the door.

"You know, Katniss, Peeta could probably help you if you need," says Prim, "He's totally acing everything at school at the moment!"

"No, really, it's fine," I say, glaring at her.

"Actually, Katniss, I could use a little extra study time, and I was wondering if I could pick your brain about that Physics assignment?"

I look at Peeta and sigh. Damn him. I couldn't refuse a thing he said to me, his eyes willing me to do his bidding.

"Ok, sure," I mumble and walk out the door towards my room. Peeta follows me in, and softly closes the door.

I search around for some clothes, relieved to finally be able to put some on. But as I'm about to pull a sweater over my head, Peeta comes over and takes it gently from my hand.

"Stop," he whispers.

He's standing only inches away from me, and I'm entranced with his eyes. The thought of refusing doesn't even cross my mind.

"Never, _ever_, wear clothes again," says Peeta with a growl.

That does me. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and press my lips onto his. Darts of fire run through me as our tongues dance together. I feel that thing in my body, that thing that means I've lost control. Peeta's not making an attempt at stopping what could happen, and I feel a jolt of nervous excitement rush through me as I realise what might be about to happen.

"Oh yay! Go Katniss, go!" I turn around at the door and see Prim standing there, clutching a video camera.

"Prim, please tell me you didn't use that thing or I swear to God I will kill you right here, right now!"

"Oh, chillax, Katniss, I need the footage for my Biology assignment. I'll blur your face out if you want."

She glances up and Mom and they both roll their eyes.

"Seriously, guys, I hate to have to tell you this, but sometimes I need a bit of _privacy_," I say, through gritted teeth.

"Oh, nonsense, Katniss, we have a free and open household here, one that need not be constricted by silly barriers like doors and walls. Now come on, Mr and Mrs Mellark have just arrived to pick up Peeta, so you two finish up your orgasms and we'll go have a nice outing to Uncle Haymitch's ice cream parlour."

Oh, joy. Not only was my body craving with the strongest hunger I'd ever known, one that was apparently destined to be left unsatisfied, I would also have to spend the next few hours at a family outing, one where everyone present knew exactly what Peeta and I had been up to. Prim would probably even show them the video.

But as I walk towards the parlour, finally wearing some clothes, Peeta takes my hand and I began to feel hope. Different feelings are rushing through me now. Ones that made me to just be with Peeta, to talk to him, to laugh with him. And although I wouldn't have objected to satiating my hunger, I knew I would probably survive it.

At least for a while.

**Please review! Make sure you let me know what you want to happen with Peeta and Katniss' relationship :)**


	6. The Artist Revisited

**Hi everyone!**

**Thanks to those of you who let me know what you want to happen with Katniss and Peeta. Nearly everyone picked option 1, so option 1 it is!**

**Thanks to everyone for reading/alerting/favouriting/reviewing. I really, really appreciate the feedback :)**

**Some of you might recognize this chapter. If you've read my other fanfics, you'll realise it's The Artist*! I've changed some things up though, so it's worth a re-read so you're up with the story arc. I'll be posting a brand new chapter soon :)**

**Hope you enjoy The Artist Revisited!**

***Yes, it is indeed The Artist, not Always Lock the Door! Thank you Mellark's Heart for picking me up on that one :) Awkward turtle!**

"I'd like to draw you, Katniss," says Peeta. I'm intrigued. We've been hanging out quite a bit lately, and he's drawn me a few times already, but he's never asked permission before.

He seems to notice my confusion.

"It's just, you have such great proportions. It would be very helpful for me to draw your body. You know, as a study of the human figure."

Fair enough, I think. It wasn't like I had anything better to do. We decide to meet the next day at his house to do it.

I go home and chat to Prim, as a part of our daily ritual. My day was excessively boring, so I decide to tell her about Peeta's request.

"What, you mean, he's gonna draw you…" Prim trails off, her face turning a little red.

"What?" I ask, impatient.

"Naked?" she says, intrigued.

Oh no. As soon as she says these words, the whole conversation I'd had with Peeta takes on a whole new meaning.

Of course he meant that he wanted me to pose nude! How had I not realised? I feel completely stupid and embarrassed.

Prim is waiting for an answer, but I leave her hanging. There is no way I am going to discuss this with her.

I needed to talk to someone, though, and I scan my mind trying to think of who to talk to. I decide upon Madge, so I quickly run around to her house.

"Madge, I need help!" I say, as soon as she opens the door.

"What is it, Katniss?" she asks.

"I may have left Peeta with the impression that I will be posing nude for him tomorrow."

Madge's brow furrows with intrigue.

"And are you going to pose nude for him tomorrow?" she asks.

"Of course not!" I say.

"Why not?" she says.

"Because it's Peeta! He can't see me naked!" I say, blushing.

"I though you didn't have feelings for Peeta," she says.

"I don't!" I say, but as I say them, I wonder if they the truth. _Did_ I have feelings for Peeta? I quickly shake the thoughts from my mind.

"Well, if you don't, then I don't see why posing nude for him is such a big deal," she says.

This is not the answer I want to hear. Grumpy, I decide to talk to someone else. I go home and dial the only number that seems a viable option.

"Effie?" I say into the phone.

"Katniss! To what do I owe this pleasure?"

I'm beginning to wonder, myself. It had made perfect sense as I walked home. Effie, Peeta's aunt from the Capitol who I'd met a few times, was the only older woman I knew who I felt could possibly listen to my predicament without everyone in town hearing about it. But as I hear her Capitol-infused voice, I begin to wonder if talking to her was such a good idea.

"I've gotten into a bit of an awkward situation with Peeta," I start out.

"Oh no," she says.

"What? I haven't even told you what it is yet!"

"I can recognise that tone a mile away! You're pregnant, aren't you?"

"No!"

"It's ok, Katniss, there's nothing to worry about. I'll send the train out to pick you two up and you can have a chat at the family planning centre here at the Capitol."

"Effie, I'm not pregnant!"

"No need to yell, Katniss! On second thoughts, I might just leave you to it. You were barely tolerable even without those pesky pregnancy hormones."

Effie hangs up and I'm left feeling confused. I decide to take a walk, and come across Haymitch's house. Of course! I could talk to Haymitch! He's always been my favourite uncle, and he's always got some advice to dish out.

I knock on Haymitch's door, hoping he isn't too drunk to chat.

"What is it, Sweetheart?" he asks, after opening the door.

"Tell me I shouldn't pose nude for Peeta tomorrow!" I say.

"What's this all about, Sweetheart? Is this some kind of new foreplay you kids are doing these days?"

"No! I am not having sex with Peeta!" I say, blushing angrily. Why did so many people assume we were a couple?

"Well, I'm relieved," he says.

"So, what do I do?"

"Maybe try surprising him? You could try jumping his bones, that usually does the trick."

"I meant about the posing!"

"Sweetheart, you're so innocent, it's so sweet" he guffaws. It takes him a while to regain control of his senses.

"Look here, Sweetheart. You and Peeta are just friends, right? So exposing his purely platonic artist's eye to your naked body should have no sexual implications whatsoever, would it not?"

I can't say that his logic was unfounded. What was the big deal about posing for Peeta, anyway? It would be perfectly innocent, and it would prove once and for all that we could maintain a friendship without any of this silly relationship nonsense.

I decide to do it. What did I have to lose?

I realise my body is in less-than-ideal condition, so I call up my aunt Octavia and explain my predicament. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem to grasp the situation very well.

"So he's using you because he can't afford to pay for a girl?" she says, more to herself than to me.

"N-"

"You know, I could just send him a call girl, that would be much simpler," she continues.

"No, thank you," I say, immediately defensive at the thought. No way was I letting one of those disgustingly perfect, curvaceous Capitol hookers near Peeta.

Not that I cared.

It was a good half an hour before I managed to scrape some beauty tips from Octavia ("Mosturise, mosturise, mosturise! And for goodness sake, tidy up your hoohoo!").

I'm just about to investigate the issue of hoohoo tidy-upping when I get a call from my cousin Cinna.

"Hi, Katniss, how are you?" he asks.

"I'm nervous and stressed," I say.

"What's up?"

I explain the whole situation.

"Katniss, you're beautiful. Any artist would be lucky to work with you. I should know! Just go out there and own it!"

Feeling eternally grateful to Cinna and his pep-talks, I march right on over to Peeta's house the next day, ready to pose.

"Hey Katniss, just get yourself comfy. I'll be back in a minute," says Peeta, gesturing to the sofa in his living room.

I'm feeling like an utter pro as I strip my clothes off and settle onto the couch in the most casual-yet-sensual pose I can manage.

"Oh my gosh, Katniss!" exclaims Peeta as he walks into the room. He immediately covers his eyes.

I'm immediately flooded with dread. Was my body deformed? Was my pose too sexual? Was my hoohoo not effectively tidied?

"What is it?" I ask with the calmest voice I can muster.

"Why are you naked?" he asks.

"I thought you wanted to draw my body!"

"I wanted you to wear clothes, Katniss!"

Oh no. What had I done? I feel utterly embarrassed and humiliated. A few tears escape my eyes and I don't even care.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" he asks me, immediately concerned.

"Don't you want to see me naked?" I ask.

"Of course I do, Katniss. What man wouldn't? It's just…" he trails off.

"What?"

He's got a funny expression on his face, something I can't quite read.

"You're very beautiful," he says.

He walks over to me and gently wipes my tears away with his thumb and kisses me lightly on the cheek. I can't help blushing a little. He walks away for a minute, and returns with his easel and paint.

"What are you doing?"

"Who am I to turn down such a good opportunity?" he says.

For hours, I lay there, watching him as he paints. He looks up at me every now and then, and every time he does, I feel his gaze burn into my skin.

I feel kind of shaky as I walk home that night, and I know it's not because I'm nervous. I realise I enjoyed today, a lot. I wonder if Peeta's painted any other girls before, but I quickly squash the thought. No, I most definitely do not care about Peeta's activities with any females. In fact, why am I even thinking about him? My feelings for him are purely platonic.

At least that's what I keep telling everyone. Myself included.

**Please review! :)**


	7. Two Can Play At That Game

**Hi everyone!**

**Ugh, I am so so sorry it took so long to upload this one. I'm doing my HSC at the moment and since here in Australia, our HSC score is the only thing that counts for uni admissions, I've been having to put my school work first. It won't be finishing anytime soon, unfortunately, so I probably won't be updating as often as I'd like. But rest assured, I'm not giving up on this story and I will, if belatedly, keep posting new chapters!**

**Thank you to everyone for reading/alerting/favouriting/reviewing. Especially reviewing – it's great to know what you guys think and if you enjoy it and what areas I can improve on :)**

**Here is Two Can Play At That Game, hope you enjoy it :)**

I'm sitting here, watching them, trying not to puke. It's disgusting.

"Aww, Peety-baby, your arms are so strong," says Johanna, her voice laced with lust.

"Yeah, it's from the bakery. Years of throwing all those flour sacks around," says Peeta, smiling.

"Lucky sacks," says Johanna, winking. She and Peeta start laughing, at which point I actually do gag. They both look up at me, as if realizing for the first time I'm in the room. I try and pass it off as a cough, but they don't look too convinced.

"Peeta, it's getting kinda late. Maybe we could head out, go to a club or something?" says Johanna.

Stupid Johanna. Stupid, perfect, ridiculously sexy Johanna. Why did she have to come visit, anyway? She had plenty of other cousins to go victimize, but no, she had to go and choose the humble abode of the Everdeen family.

It's kind of funny, actually, watching her trying to flirt with Peeta. I know him much better than she does – there is no way he'd go out on a date with a girl he's only just met.

"Yeah, that sounds like fun!" says Peeta.

Ugh.

They're heading towards the door when they seem to remember, once again, that I'm in the room.

"Oh, Katniss, did you want to come along as well?" says Johanna.

I notice her lips mouthing me a less-than-subtle 'no'. I see Peeta helping her into her jacket. I see that this is a date.

So there's only one thing I can say.

"Sure! Just let me get changed!" I say perkily.

Johanna glares at me as I race out of the room, feeling pretty damn pleased with myself. No one was going to have a successful date with Peeta Mellark on my watch.

I run straight to my dresser and pull out the big guns. The teeny-tiny black leather dress I'd used as a Catwoman costume for Halloween last year, Prim's social-experiment fishnets and Mom's stilettos from her youth. I tousle my hair and put on some makeup. I check myself out in the mirror and feel very satisfied.

I strut back into the living room.

"Let's get out of here," I say casually.

The two of them stare at me for some time, rendered speechless by my attire.

"Oh, um, wow, Katniss, you look really good," says Peeta, eventually.

"Thanks, Peeta," I say, and walk to towards the door. "And those aren't my eyes," I say with a wink, as I walk past him.

Johanna glares at me malevolently. Good.

We arrive at the club. At first I'm a bit overwhelmed – it's my first time in a place like this, and the deafening music and grinding bodies are a bit much to handle. But when I see that Johanna has lead Peeta away to the bar, I remember I'm on a mission, and follow them over there.

"Two martinis," Peeta is saying.

"Sex on the beach for me," I say.

The two of them look at me, Peeta a little nonplussed, Johanna looking malicious. I wink at them and scull my drink, relishing in the calm it brings upon me.

"Woah, Katniss!"

I turn to my right to see the source of the interjection. It's Cray, a boy from my class at school. I'm about to turn away from him in discust – he's a player and a sleaze – when I get an idea.

Jealousy. Envy. All too easy to create. Extremely powerful when produced in high quantities. This is exactly what I need right now.

"Hey Cray," I say in the most seductive voice I can manage. I turn my body so I'm facing him squarely, just like Prim always insists I do with good-looking guys.

He sees my empty glass.

"What's your drink?"

"Sex on the beach."

"Is that an invitation?" he says seedily.

"You wish," I say, slapping him playfully on the shoulder.

This time, it's Peeta's turn to gag.

I turn around and smile at him smugly.

"Something wrong, Peeta?" I ask innocently.

"Nothing, nothing at all," he says, shooting daggers at Cray.

I lean into his ear.

"Well, that means there's no reason to interrupt Cray and me. Isn't he hot?" I whisper.

"Katniss, can we have a chat? Alone?"

"Fine," I shrug, curious. Could my plan be working already?

Peeta leads us to a quiet corner of the club.

"Katniss, what are you doing?"

"Well, at the moment, I'm respirating. Later I might even try pumping a bit of blood around my veins."

"Oh, shut up. Stop being a smartass. What are you doing with Cray?"

At that moment, Cray fittingly looks up at us and I give him a flirty wave. Once he's looked down, I turn face-on to Peeta.

"Well, he's a guy. I'm a girl. He's hot. I'm attracted to him. Got a problem with that?"

I frown at him, daring him to challenge me.

"No," he says coldly, and walks back to Johanna.

Damn.

I spot a table in the middle of the room, a pole coming out of it and into the ceiling. I know immediately what it's for. An idea hits my mind, and at first I'm against it. But desperate times call for desperate measures.

So I do it.

I climb up onto the table. I'm a bit shaky at first – the stilettos are a nightmare to balance on – but eventually I get the hang of it. I try and move my body like I've seen in the movies. The crowd begins to cheer. I'm feeling pretty damn sexy.

"Come on boys, who wants Katniss?" I shout to the crowd. The cheering is almost deafening. I'm feeling satisfied – if this doesn't make Peeta jealous, I don't know what will.

I survey the crowd. I see Johanna, glaring rancorously at me. I see Cray, who's looking at me seedily, licking his lips. I think I also see Mr Sae, my math teacher, and Mr Hawthorne, Gale's dad. Shit. Apparently the whole male population of the town has seen this.

Except, apparently, Peeta.

I can't see him anywhere, but the click of the door gives him away. He's gone.

I wave goodbye to the crowd and step back down onto the ground. I start heading for the door, but apparently the world is working against me today.

"Katniss! It's nice to see you!"

It's Mayor Undersee. My best friend Madge's dad. Crap.

"Hi, Mayor Undersee," I say as perkily as I can manage.

"That was quite an enthusiastic dance you did up there," he says.

"Yes, well, I am in training for my next ballet exam," I say, blushing.

He ignores me. He's clearly here with a purpose.

"Katniss, I know it's perfectly natural for you to be experiencing feelings of a sexual nature. But I'm not sure that oscillating your hips in such an erotic manner for all the town to see is the best idea. Now, as Mayor, I feel it my responsibility to guide the young people of this town successfully through adolescence and into adulthood, so I have some alternative suggestions for you."

"Well, Mayor Undersee, thank you but that really isn't nec-"

He pulls a list out of his pocket, and cuts me short as he begins to recite:

"1. Watch some pornographic films with your Mom and Dad, so they can explain to you what's going on. 2. Purchase some erotica novels and pose any questions you have to your parents or another trusted adult. 3. Go along to a cat- or dog-breeding session and take notes."

He's not finished yet. From the look of his list, he'll be going for days. So I interrupt him and bid him adieu as politely as I can, and all but sprint out the door.

Peeta's there, standing by the door. He's staring at the cracks in the pavement

"I thought you'd left," I say. Peeta looks up at me and sighs.

"I wouldn't leave you, Katniss," he says coldly.

"What's up with you?"

"Katniss, what the hell were you thinking? Dancing like that, leading Cray on?"

"I'm sorry, Peeta, if I want to express my emotions through dance!"

"It's not you, Katniss! Where's the Katniss I love, the one who's shy to wear less than a t-shirt in public, the one who's never looked at a boy for as long as I can remember?"

A strange feeling overcomes me when he says the word 'love'.

"You love me?" I ask shyly.

"As a friend," he says, quickly.

I sigh.

"Walk me home?" I ask.

"Sure," he says, smiling.

He takes my hand and we walk back to my house in silence.

All in all, not a bad day's work.

**Please review! :)**


	8. Things That Go Argh in the Night

**Hi everyone!**

**I'm so so sorry I haven't updated in so long. I had so much homework and exams, I simply couldn't fit in time to write. I've finished my HSC now though, and I'll be updating much more often now :)**

**Just a quick note about this chapter – here in Australia usually once a year every class goes on a camping trip together, usually a hiking, kayaking or rock-climbing camp in the bush or beach for a few days. Here it's pretty much the norm, but I was talking to an American friend of mine who said they never did anything like that during high school. So I thought I'd just let you know just in case you thought it was a bit weird!**

**Thank you for reading/alerting/favouriting/reviewing to everyone over the past couple of months. It's been great coming back to FF and seeing that people are still reading and enjoying this :)**

**Here's Things that Go "Argh" in the Night :) Hope you enjoy it!**

"Are we there yet?"

"Quit it, Oily!"

"Oh, shut up, all of you!"

Ugh. Stupid camping trips. Why we have to walk around the mountains for days and days with our stupid, indoors-minded classmates was beyond me. I normally like the outdoors, but when the boys start laughing at the animals and the girls start crying about their broken nails, I feel like aiming my bow and arrow at their heads.

The worst part of it all? I have to share a tent with Oily Sae. The bitchiest, most Barbie-like of all the girls in my class. She had a fight with her best friend Euralie Donner, so she has to bunk with me, a decision that both of us are regretting.

We finally make it back to base camp for the night. I sit outside by the fire for a while and then decide to go the tent and go to bed. I walk in the tent, but when I do, I take one look at the scene and regret the decision immediately.

"Oily! Seriously, some things you can't un-see!"

Oily is lying down on her sleeping bag, wearing nothing but a candy-strung g-string.

"Calm down, Katniss," she says, still lying serenely with her eyes shut, "it's for Cray. We're having a screw tonight."

"Are you, now? Well, thanks for letting me know," I say, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"You're welcome. Now, if I were you, I'd get out of here before he arrives. Unless you want to turn it into a ménage à trois."

Ugh.

I walk back out to the campfire. Everyone else has gone back to their tents, except for Peeta. He's still sitting by the fire, toasting a piece of bread.

"I thought you'd gone to bed," he says as I sit down next to him.

"Don't even ask," I say. He shrugs.

"So, what's new?"

"Can I sleep with you tonight?"

"Excuse me?"

Oh crap. Why do I keep forgetting sleep has two meanings? Stupid Katniss.

"Not like that! It's just I'm tired, and there's no way I'm going back to my tent."

Peeta shrugs.

"Sure, why not."

So we go to his tent, but I realise there's only one sleeping bag. And it's freezing cold.

Peeta crawls into his sleeping bag.

"So, how are we gonna do this?" I ask.

"Oh stop being such a baby, Katniss. Get in," he says, patting the very small amount of empty space in the sleeping bag.

"No way!" I say.

"Fine, have it your way. Have a fun night freezing to death," he says.

I glare at him, and realise there's no other option. I tell him to shove over, and I crawl in next to him.

We are close. We are very close. And I can't help noticing how strong his arms are, how calming his breathing is. This is going to be harder than I thought.

"ARRRRGH!"

I'm broken out of my thoughts with a terrifying jolt. We hear lots of rushing around and people shouting. I try and get out of the sleeping bag, but the zip is stuck. Oh crap.

"Get it off!" I say to Peeta, "Do it quickly!"

"I can't, it's too hard," he replies.

"Well then push!"

"I can't, it's stuck!"

The tent flap bursts open, and Gale storms in.

"What the hell is this?"

"Oh good, Gale, you're here. Can you get me out of here, we're stuck!"

"What, first Oily and now you? Seriously, Katniss, I'd never have thought you'd do something like this. Well, I guess I was wrong."

"What are you talking about, Gale? Can you please just get me out of here?"

Then Madge walks in.

"Katniss, you won't believe what just happened! Oily was caught –"

"Don't tell me, Madge. I really don't want to know."

"Seriously? It's good, Katniss, I promise."

"Please can you just help me? Peeta and I are stuck."

"How are you stuck, Katniss?"

"We're stuck inside this damn sleeping bag. It's too hard to pull out."

"You mean you're stuck as in _stuck_? Oh gosh, Katniss, this is much more exciting than Oily! How did it even happen?"

"The zip must have broken."

"What do you mean the zip? What's that got to do with anything?"

Now I'm confused. But before I can ask, Euralie rushes in.

"Katniss! Get up, Mr Sae wants you back in your tent. I can't believe what happened with Oily. She's so embarrassed!"

"I can't, we're stuck!"

Euralie bursts into fits of laughter.

"Oh, this is good! I thought Oily was funny, but this is so much better!"

She turns towards Oily's tent and yells, "Mr Sae! Come quick!"

Mr Sae arrives and takes one look at us and looks like he's going to faint. I know we're technically not supposed to share a tent with the opposite sex, but honestly, what's so bad about it? It's not like Peeta and I were having sex or anything like Oily was. We were just sleeping together.

Oh. _Oh_. OH!

"Katniss Everdeen. Peeta Mellark. I cannot believe this. In all my thirty years of teaching, I have not seen such behaviour. First I find my own daughter in an unsavorily passionate embrace with a young lad, and now my two best students are sneaking around defiling one another! Detention, for a year!"

And he simply falls down and faints.

Oh crap. How had this even happened? By now the whole class was gathered around giggling and taking pictures. And now Oily Sae has arrived.

"I misjudged you, Everdeen," she says, "I'm proud of you. Welcome to the club."

And she tosses me a candy thong.

I am beyond mortified.

Peeta picks the thong up and I feel his lips on my ear.

"Next time, please wear this. If we're going to get punished for having sex then we might as well make sure it wasn't for nothing."

I looked at his face and saw he was winking.

Oh god, oh _god_, oh GOD!

And that's all I remember. I blacked out after that.

I never did recover fully from that camping trip. But I learned my lesson. Never again will I share a sleeping bag with a boy. And never, ever will I look at candy the same way again.

**Thanks for reading! Please review :)**


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